You Might Be A Latent Print Examiner IF...
by Jim McNutt,
Sedgwick County Sheriff’s Department, Wichita, KS
an original article for CLPEX.com
August, 2003

You Might Be A Latent Print Examiner IF...
by Jim McNutt

It has been my experience that latent print examiners are a very interesting, but somewhat weird collection of individuals. Being a little weird should be taken as a compliment of course. With that in mind I think that all of us, at sometime or another, have thought of or done something that others can appreciate. In the vein of Jeff Foxworthy’s “you might be a red neck” here is a collection of thoughts indicating “you might be a latent print examiner.” Enjoy.

I would like to thank Shaheen Aumeer, Angela Berry, Floyd Bowen, Lloyd Paul Brannon, Dennis Degler, David Fairhurst, Ray Garrison, Glenn, Mindy Johnson, Tom Krull, Stephany Louk-Denney, Charles Parker, Bill Schade, Terry Smith, Hans Teer, Kasey Wertheim, and others who contribute after these acknowledgements were made, for their contributions to this article.

If...when you hear someone refer to a fingerprint pattern as a "swirl" you grit your teeth and explain to them that swirls are in ice cream, NOT fingerprints...you might be a latent print examiner.

If…you inspect the bowls of jello at the buffet to get the slice with no fingerprint on top…you might be a latent print examiner.

If… you’re more interested in what’s on the outside of the beer glass instead of the contents…

If...after eating at a nice restaurant, you wipe down the glass you were drinking from…

If…you hear the name Charles Darwin and immediately think “Cousin of Sir Francis Galton” rather than “Father of the Theory of Evolution….

If…you check your teenage daughter for fingerprints after every date…

If…on your first date you muster up the courage to take her hand gently in yours, tenderly rotate it palmar side up, and gaze down at her beautiful friction ridge skin…

If…when your child says he didn’t touch it and you’ve taken his prints and compared them to the prints left on the window you just cleaned…

If…you take the time to figure out which puppy made the muddy prints on the couch (just to confirm the guilty look she gives you)…

If…you know the “Crimewatch” fingerprint is upside down…(for the UK readers. Crimewatch is a UK TV program.)

If…you noticed the fingerprint on the front of the IAI St. Louis conference flyer is upside down…

If…you tend to handle most items, (doorknobs, money, documents etc.) with the inside surface of your fingers, even when you are away from the office…

If…you can’t seem to walk past a fingerprint card without picking it up to examine it…

If …you see aliens, horses, snakes, smiley faces, a Cyclops, (or who knows what else) in fingerprints…

If…every aspect of your life is a quality or quantity issue…

If…you bring home your new kitten and decide to name it “Daubert”…

If…you look at your coffee table with oblique lighting before you “wax it with Pledge”…

If…you have an excess stash of superglue in your refrigerator…

If… you have ten-print images over your desk, instead of a pin-up girlie (or beefcake for the ladies) calendar…

If…you have noticed that the print on top of the Dinty Moore Beef Stew can is a double loop whorl with virtually no Galton details…

If… when you go to the zoo you tend to notice the bifurcations and ridge endings in the zebra stripes more than the zebras…

If…you have a picture of the standard fingerprint patterns hanging on the wall of your home, and you call it “art”…

If…you have ever examined your feet to see if the patterns on your toes are different than the patterns on your fingers…

If… you find yourself having to stop so you can examine the prints on glass doors to banks, convenience stores, office buildings, etc…

If…you find yourself examining patent prints on the elevator door instead of pretending to read the inspection certification…

If…you examine and criticize the level of detail on your newborn child’s footprints on the hospital records, then you want to do it right! …

If…you just had a baby and you think because the baby has loops instead of whorls it takes more after you…

If… you have compared the pattern types of your children with you, your spouse, your parents, your in-laws, grandparents, etc. etc….

If… when you see a print on a TV cop show you are compelled to point out the pattern type, which finger it probably came from, to the person you are with (who usually doesn’t care)…

If… you try to find a pattern in the sand ridges of a desert…

And my personal favorite, a special thanks to David Fairhurst:
If…you know the McKie identification is WRONG!!!....you might be a latent print examiner.